Wishing you a Happy Retirement from Firefighting
What if we spent less time putting out fires and more time nourishing a truly good flame?
“I used to run a business where all I did was put out fires.” A colleague of mine shared this over lunch last week. He went on to explain how firefighting actually gave his life a lot of meaning. It meant he was needed! Continually and desperately, actually.
“Eventually,” he said, “you can get really tired of fighting fires.”
Which promptly reminded me that we have a fire-less word for that: burnout.
He went on, “You realize maybe what you really want is to build an organization where the primary fire is within the people - not consuming the organization.”
Wisdom if I ever heard it.
And in this fall season where we gather more regularly around fire pits and fireplaces it has me considering how many of us have grown up and become professional firefighters, just without the truck and gear.
(Actual firefighters standing next to guy who did not realize he, too, was a firefighter in too many seasons of adulthood)
And I wonder how many of us would welcome a chance to engage with fire in a different way. To that end, here are two questions I am mulling as I write beside our fireplace:
1. What is one sign that you’re in an organization (or living a life) where most of the energy is spent covering down on the latest fire?*
Having lived this past summer under a burn ban for the entire season, this one is easy: extremely dry conditions. Nobody in our area was allowed to light a fire outside because the drought conditions were so significant. A little spark could be the end of acres of land, houses, and more.
If the people in our organization are living day-to-day with…
a frenzied tiredness,
a dull ‘I-guess-I-have-to-do-this’ mentality to most things,
a routine feeling of be overwhelmed and under-supported…
…those are drought conditions.
A little gossip, a small mistake, a weird look - these things that would otherwise fizzle to nothing in a well-watered environment - they catch with uncontrollable speed across the dry soul-scape.
In such a setting, the day has not even begun and already everyone in the office or the family is running around to share the latest OMG Wildfire. Each sharing consumes another acre of creative real estate.
Eventually some realize that things have gotten out-of-control, and no real work (or life) is being done. The rest of the day is then dedicated to tamping down the crazy that no one saw coming that morning. But also no one is surprised. Because, at some level, we know when we are living in drought conditions.
And once real burnout singes regularly on our lives…
once we see that we signed up for something that is costing us far too much…
once we realize we’ve become inadvertent firefighters…
…we begin asking this second question:
2. How do you protect and sustain the good kind of fire within a people and organization?
Let’s first admit - a lot of fires are really good. And necessary!
Fires…
Give warmth and light.
Protect us and cook our meals.
Trigger seeds to germinate - which is to say, they are growth multiplier!
Sustaining and protecting that kind of fire takes three things:
Fuel
In particular, lots of kindling and a few, sizable logs.
I added some helpful kindling last week when I attended an Open Mic Night where folks in the community could share five-minute, original pieces at our local bookstore. Some people, I know, would rather run around on acres aflame than stand in front of strangers and bear their awkward prose. Me? Kindling. Big time.
(Open Mic kindling-in-action)
Basically, kindling is all the small stuff that illumines us. Overlook it once or twice, no big deal. The fire can persist. Go week after week having lost sight of kindling maintenance? We’re in danger of losing the good kind of fire.
What habits, hobbies, or outlets are kindling for you? What are the daily or weekly rhythms that help keep a solid vitality aflame? What’s the kindling in your organization?
And then logs.
This past July, our family visited North Carolina for two weeks. A good chunk of that time was spent outdoors - hiking, reflecting, laughing. Also, I did no work. Really.
I think for the first time in my life I didn’t open emails while I was away. And when I returned there was an inner vitality I had not experienced in some time. In a previous post, I wrote it about how important that Forest Bathing trip was. In these more recent days I am coming to see clearly - that was a log.
And so are these:
Extended time in nature of most any kind.
Full-day adventures with a friend or spouse or family.
Team retreats.
Engaging deeply with a hobby for a few days.
No need to throw a new log onto the fire every day or even every week. But, goodness, go a few months or years without a log? Then we’re in danger of losing the good kind of fire.
What kind of logs have worked best for you in the past? What logs are on the 2023 calendar?
Oxygen
16% oxygen must be in the air for a fire to start.
In work and life, there is one thing that clears stifling, suffocating, or otherwise depleted air space to a point well-beyond the 16% threshold: Gratitude.
Ann Lamont observes, “gratitude, not understanding, is the key to joy and equanimity…gratitude, thankfulness, that sense of having been helped, saved, seen, enriched by life, a good person, a lucky break, it is magic.”
Gratitude is a bellows-blast of magic to a fledgling fire.
Is a blast of fresh air due to someone around you?
A Boundary
Enduring, good fires have bricks, stones, or rocks surrounding them. Fireplaces, in particular, contain the flame and so notably increase the heat’s intensity as compared to an outdoor fire pit.
In life, boundaries are essential for maintaining a vibrant, intense flame. The best boundary for the fire within? The word No.
All of two letters, it is nevertheless one of the very hardest words for most of us to utter. We want to be helpful. We want to participate in all the good things that come our way. We want to believe it’s possible to Do It All. Yes! we’re prone to say with frequency and fervency, followed too often by guilt, resentment, and tiredness….
Much could be said about this, but for now, one of the best pieces of advice on the word ‘no’ comes from Greg McKeown’s recent book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less:
“If it isn’t a clear yes, then it’s a clear no.”
If whatever is being asked, requested or invited is not clearly a flame-enhancing thing, then no.
Lots of ‘no’s’ are the bricks that surround the few ‘yeses’ that free the flame to burn with greatest intensity. Do we have a solid sense of where are strongest ‘yeses’ need to be? Are we due to add a few bricks in the coming days?
—
Firefighting is a noble, essential profession, and I am genuinely grateful for those who enter the profession willingly. But I wonder if too many of us have inadvertently found ourselves firefighters - and we really need to retire asap.
Besides, it’s fall!
Is there a better time to pull together some kindling-and-logs, a pair of bellows, and a few bricks? Couldn’t we all benefit greatly from the warmth, light, and vitality that would come forth from a truly good fire?
Here’s to your happy retirement!
(Maybe celebrate with s’mores?)
*This post is the outline for a training workshop that can be done with teams and organizations. Message me in the comments if you would like to learn more about having me facilitate that.
Great thoughts! I left a lot of those fires behind when I retired from DeKalb County. I am happily fueling good fires teaching half day kindergarten! It is bringing great joy!
Belated apology for missing the open mic night. I was fighting a fire. Giving rise to the notion that I frequently run around with my hair on fire. Don’t forget me on the next one and I shall endeavor to be there. Maybe I’ll even light one of those internal fires and read something myself (but no promises).