“The most powerful person in the world is the storyteller. The storyteller sets the vision, values, and agenda of an entire generation that is to come.” Steve Jobs
Our brains are wired to crave stories, we make meaning by way of stories, and we remember stories far longer and more deeply than facts. Among other things, this means that those who know how to tell a story immediately gain a significant connection and even kinship with those around them.
Indeed, if you are…
a leader
run a business
fundraise
parent
persuade others to vote for a person or project
lead a family
and/or breathe as a human being…
…there is nothing more important to your lasting impact, influence, and legacy than your ability to tell a good story. Fortunately, we’ve been storytelling for thousands of years. Unfortunately, in our Enlightenment-influenced, data-saturated society, some of us have forgotten the art.
In fact, as one who has been regularly storytelling for the past couple of decades, I receive a version of the following questions with some frequency:
How does one tell a good story? Is there a template or model or some kind of guideline that makes clear how to do this kind of thing?
The truth is, I’ve never followed or kept any sort of template but… I do recognize that there are some key fundamentals for making it work, and that is what I want to share through this new, four-part series entitled, quite simply, The Art of Storytelling.
Each portion of the series will unpack one aspect of good storytelling and then invite you to try an exercise to begin doing some of your own storytelling for yourself, your community, or your company.
Where to begin The First Lesson?
With a story, of course…
STORY
Fifteen years ago I was the new guy on a community softball team in Atlanta, GA, and, given their welcoming smiles and hearty handshakes, I sensed my teammates were excited to have me. It didn’t hurt that I had played baseball through high school, which gave me a natural knack for the game. Also, all of them were in their mid-30s and 40s, and I think they appreciated a pair of mid-20-something legs that were far less concerned about pulling a hamstring.
What they didn’t know was how nervous I was.
Sure, it was only a community softball team, but have you ever seen how some guys get when we start reliving our high school glory days? Plus, I was intimidated by guys 10+ years my age, I was in awe of their professional accomplishments, and I also knew they’d been together as a team for a few years - I didn’t want to mess up a good thing!
So, as I was standing out in left field on a Thursday evening in the very first inning of the very first game of the season, a mantra began running through my head. I didn’t ask for it, didn’t plan for it, and didn’t want it, but there it arrived:
"Don’t hit it to me."
"Don’t hit it to me."
"Don’t hit it to me."
On cue, the very first batter took one to shallow left - and it was catchable if I went for it! As I began racing toward it, a new, also-uninvited mantra arrived to my head:
"Don’t drop it."
"Don’t drop it."
"Don’t drop it."
Eventually, I leapt! True, the leap was a bit hesitant given how much I was in my own head, but I was also quite close to the ball and…
…
…(!)
I did not catch the ball. To put it mildly.
My glove hand hit the grass first, and somehow the rest of my body did a vertical nosedive above the glove hand such that the full weight of my body fell directly onto that hand. The momentum proved so forceful that I immediately crushed numerous bones in my left hand.
Like helium to a balloon, the hand began swelling brightly while I did my best “there’s no crying in baseball/softball” impression. Mostly, my tears refused to play along. It was pretty excruciating.
Fairly soon, I was swept off to the local ER where I remained in the waiting room for a painfully long time as I stared at my left pinky finger, ring finger, and middle finger dangling at a near-right angle from their normal position.
Turns out a rather involved surgery would need to be scheduled, but because the nature of my impending surgery required a hand specialist who was currently out of town, the surgery would not happen until Monday morning. To tide me over, they put my entire left forearm and most of my left hand into a huge, white cast and sent me off with Vicatin.
Good luck. Rest up. Lay low.
Given how quickly everything unfolded, I still had not processed the implications of a long, uncertain healing process. Instead, as a young pastor at that time, what was at the forefront of my mind was the fact that I had a sermon to preach on Sunday - and even more urgently - a wedding to officiate on Saturday.
STORY PAUSE
(we’ll pick up the story in next week’s post)
If you want to learn how to tell a good story about your life, an event, your business, or otherwise, start with the broken hand.
Start with a pain point, a problem, a crisis, or some kind of challenge - and from that point, you can build the story.
Too often, we are tempted to tell stories that avoid such realities and make us look good:
I played softball one Thursday night, the team did great, and we won.
We started the company with a really good idea, we followed our plan, and we are super successful!
We’re a faith community that loves our community and our people and we just have a wonderful time together!
We graduated, got great jobs, started a beautiful family, and love the little neighborhood we found!
Boring.
Not relatable.
Well aren’t you special is what I want to say to myself for telling a story that way.
(Too perfect)
If nobody navigated (or is navigating) an internal and/or external challenge of some sort then there is no story.
Because at the Fundamental 1-2-3 of Stories-and-Emotions is this:
The thing that makes stories uniquely powerful is that they connect to us on an emotional (and even unconscious) level.
Those connections are not made unless the story itself gets to an emotional place.
An emotional space, by definition, unfolds in and through moments and seasons of challenge.1 It may be a super small challenge or problem. Or a really big one. But one way or another, this aspect is fundamental to a good story.
Exercise for Storytelling:
As you think about your life, your organization, your family, or your community, start here:
Make a list of the ‘broken hands’ - i.e. the pain points, problems, crises, and challenges that you have navigated (or are navigating). As an example, if you are writing a story for your organization, you might list notable challenges that have happened over the course of your organization’s existence. Or, you may choose to scale this down to the last two weeks. In both cases, a myriad of possible stories exist.
Take a deep breath, and then listen for the ‘broken hands’ on your list that have the most emotional resonance for you; the ones where you feel something as you remember them (even if you cannot clearly name the something right now). Circle those.
Write one or two of those stories down and see what happens. Know that my future posts on this topic will unpack some specifics around writing/telling a compelling story. For now, don’t worry about getting things perfect - or even remotely close to it. Just do what feels natural as you unpack this particular pain point/problem/crisis/challenge.
To be sure, the stories you write down may never be for public consumption. But… if you have picked ones that have some measure of emotional resonance for you, you can know with 100% confidence that already those stories have the ability to connect with, inspire, and move others. Which means that you are closer than you might realize to harnessing the true power of storytelling.
Below is a corporate example of storytelling from Warby Parker, as found on their website. The thing to note for today? It begins with a problem where one of the founders felt within himself a genuine frustration.
Our founders were students when one of them lost his glasses on a backpacking trip. The cost of replacing them was so high that he spent the first semester of grad school without them, squinting and complaining. (We don't recommend this.)
The others had similar experiences and were amazed at how hard it was to find a pair of great frames that didn't leave their wallets bare. Where were the options?
It turns out there's a simple explanation. The eyewear industry is dominated by a single company that has been able to keep prices artificially high while reaping huge profits from consumers who have no other options.
Warby Parker was started to create an alternative. By circumventing traditional channels, designing glasses in-house, and engaging with customers directly, we're able to provide higher-quality, better-looking prescription eyewear at a fraction of the going price.
We believe that buying glasses should be easy and fun. It should leave you happy and good-looking, with money in your pocket.
We also believe that everyone has the right to see. Approximately one billion people around the world need glasses but don't have access to them—so to help address this problem, we work with a handful of partners worldwide to ensure that for every pair of glasses sold, a pair is distributed to someone in need. To date, over 15 million pairs of glasses have been distributed through our Buy a Pair, Give a Pair program.
There's nothing complicated about it. Good eyewear, good outcome.
Another word for challenge, pain point, problem, or crisis)? Vulnerable. The best stories always have some measure of emotional exposure.
Great idea. I will practicing with you.
Bobby you don’t have to worry about it you got you have great stories and you tell them wonderful that keeps us in excitement during the whole thing waiting for the end keep on doing what you’re doing you’re doing a great job Linda A